Sick Dog Update

I took Griffin to the vet first thing this morning. I spent all of yesterday bursting into tears every time I looked at or even thought about him. BF came over for a while in the evening and when he left, there were tears in his eyes. The thought of putting this dog to sleep has been killing me.

The vet didn't redo the blood tests from before. Griffin's infected eye has been getting worse and worse and when the vet looked at it, he thought that almost everything wrong with him was going back to the infection and a severely compromised immune system. It's possible he got pneumonia first which compromised the immune system enough to lead to infection, or maybe the other way around.

The vet was wonderful. He was very realistic and a true advocate for me. He suggested I return Griffin to the previous owner because the expense that might be required in this dog would be high. He was looking out for my best interest, but I couldn't help but wonder what would happen to Griffin.

The vet told me that his eye needed to be operated on or he would lose the eye, possibly his life, within the week. Operate or walk out with a very sick dog and bring him back. As I sat on the floor with Griffin, sobbing hysterically, the vet tech (and therapist for today) handed me tissues and helped me talk through it.

I could return him, but I wasn't sure that the former owner had the money or was prepared to deal with all of Griffin's needs. And as I thought about it more, I realized that there is NO way I could just drop him off and never look back. I would always wonder, would agonize. The surgery was $400. I don't have bags of money laying around and certainly don't want to waste that amount of money, but as I sat there, paralyzed, holding my dog, I decided that it was a decent price to pay for my sanity. And yes, he still has other issues and might be a money trap in the long run, but I don't have to make any decisions about that now.

Maybe I will bring him back or find him a new home, or maybe once we get rid of the infection, he will be okay. None of that matters at the moment. I decided to just take it one step at a time. So today he had eye surgery. We'll see what happens after that.

This is a photo from the lobby of the vet's office. They have a life sized white bulldog statute that looks just like Olivia. Griffin went right to it and rested his little chin on top of it's head like he does with Olivia. It was so priceless and heartbreaking at the same time.