Support

The email went out letting people know that camp is struggling. And then the email responses came flooding in.

My inbox was full of kind, thoughtful, supportive responses. Some were short and sweet- parents wishing they had a few extra millions to help camp, and some of the emails offered concern for how I was handling it. There were compliments about how I've turned camp around and how camp has changed kids lives. Every email was nicer than the next.

When my dad died, camp sent out an email letting people know and I got a very similar response. I didn't realize how much it would mean to me to have people's support and that just a simple email could give me strength. I appreciated every single email I received and I still have all of them saved in a folder.

But it was also really draining to respond to all of them. "Thank you for your kindness and support..." I wanted to crawl into bed and not deal with any of it.

That's a little bit how I feel with these camp emails. They mean a lot to me, but knowing that a camper is dreaming about being a LIT (in 5 years) or a counselor (in 8 years) or that camp is the one place a kid feels like he belongs and has friends is a little bit crushing. I know camp changes lives- I have been getting extraordinary emails, cards, letters and in person stories for years. Every story brings joy to my heart and makes me swell with pride.

Camp is going to close. It's the right step for the organization and running the foundation is the right next step for me in my life. But it's also going to be agonizing and another experience with profound grief.

Ugh.